For a long I thought I shouldn’t be expressing negativity or darkness in my writings…but then I read poems by Sylvia Plath and she changed my mind…I believe forever. Here’s a small poem inspired by her writings. I haven’t tried to write like her that wasn’t my intention. I just liked how she went so deep into the alleys of her mind.How I wish, if someone had helped her when she was in pain..
And I have killed my intuitions so many times that I have forgotten how it feels to live and love the moment simultaneously.
Why should I even bother anyone with my lamentations I need no sympathy No comfort to console my unexpressed grief
Follow your intuitions, he told me I said it’s precarious Intuitions die the very moment they are born, How do I trust the frailties of my mind? I cannot imagine myself turning blind towards what’s visible I cannot imagine myself turning blind towards what’s poking me My mind seeks light Darkness is beyond my comprehension
It’s your fear, he told me.
Yes it’s fear Fear of losing my present In the attempt to surpass reality Fear that my beliefs will always be wrong and I’ll end up worse than my present. The fear of attachment The fear of detachment The fear of being stranded in between
This pride is making you hollow, he said Yes my pride My borrowed pride, the price is pay is peace of my mind My pride Bestowed upon me From the days of my innocence Ignorant of it’s definitions Ignorant of it’s consequences But I never owned the pride for my own self I never wore it on my sleeves I rather kept it hidden inside my pockets The deep pockets of my mind.
He said don’t worry Don’t think much And he said so many many things…
Explore life as everyone says nowadays. But no one tells you exploring does not only mean hiking through the highs It also means getting lost in utter darkness It means finding beauty in the stars when the moon is waxing and waning Just like your sensibility.. Wandering through the endless caves of our madness Turning blind when there’s light, right above our head Exploring is not only about the shiny meadows and lush waterfalls Exploring at times feels like being trapped in our own helplessness. We might equate exploration with a sudden adrenaline burst But oftentimes, feeling nothing is also exploration. If you are adventurous enough..be ready for both.. To feel everything And to feel nothing..
People create memories Be it by your closed ones Be it from strangers At times the ones created by strangers become more dear to our hearts than the ones created by our closed ones
Places create memories too The walls The cracks on those walls The broken parts of those walls The roads The alleys The streetlights The not so lit up parts The traffic, the endless honking The displaced and misplaced pavement blocks The markets The bargaining The colourful women selling fruits, books and everything that you might not need The simple men cycling their way through the hardships of life
Amongst all these who are doing their share of business
There stands an onlooker Waiting for the his luck to alter
The onlooker is being observed by a broke writer
But might I just the writer, Observe closer Listen more keenly And you could hear the buildings laughing at your pedestrian crossing skills!!
The creator of this video is only trying to explain the concept and I’m not having any prejudices against the creator of this video. He has made an exceptionally beautiful video. I have watched many videos explaining Nihilism and I guess this one explains Nihilism in the best way.
The video talks about a philosophy called “Nihilism”, which means nothing matters. Life is meaningless. Everyone is going to die anyway.
Ok, that’s too much negativity for the weekend.
If we are to establish the significance of this philosophy compared to the measurements of time, I would say this concept holds relevance hardly for a minute.
At the same time I also believe that humans aren’t any kind of supreme creation who will add value into the chaos of this universe. I mean we do have the capacity of adding more chaos into the chaos but value…I doubt let’s see..let’s be optimistic about it.
I believe in the following,
Why is that we humans always want to understand the meaning of our existence in the context of this universe? It’s impossible to judge the meaning of our existence in the context of the universe since we haven’t completely understood the nature of this universe. The concept of nihilism seems incomplete. If life has no meaning does that mean death is meaningful? And it’s impossible for our minds to get a hold of these larger than life concepts…or philosophies. I’m not an expert on human brain biology…but I don’t think we are wired to accept nihilism..had that been the case humans wouldn’t have ever discovered fire.
To form an opinion about anything, firstly we need to have complete knowledge about the object of the concept and the peripheral mechanism or structure in which the object operates. Here the object is human life and the peripheral mechanism is the universe.
Have we gained the integral wisdom of human life?
Let alone the meaning of this universe!!
So how can anyone say life is meaningless?
Compare the life of a human with the existence of a neutron star. Life seems meaningless.
Compare the life of a human with that of the butterflies flying randomly over the daisies in your vicinity…life seems beautiful.
The other argument
And there is no need to feel devalued just because we can’t time travel or because one fine day the sun will devour our planet!! The more knowledge we acquire, the doom becomes more evident and seems imminent as well. Yes it’s all going to end one day..but what about the journey?
Some ardent nihilists might argue what of the journey when no one remains to record and no one remains to listen to our stories?
I got no answers for them.
Comparing the meaning of our lives on the grand scale of this universe or multiverse as some say…will only pose unsolvable riddles. Acknowledging the limitations of human potentiality and creating something meaningful in the given set of limitations…I believe adds meaning to human life. I think it depends on us as humans to create meaning…life inherently may not have any meaning but it can be created. Accept life the way it is… chasing for immortality and pomposity will not make us gods…if that is what we are aiming for!!
Did you know “Experience” by Ludovico Einaudi isn’t his only master creation..his composition, “Primavera” is equally enchanting.
A lot many changes are taking place in my personal life. Changes that are compelling me to change my attitude towards Life and Happiness. I have always pondered upon what it truly means to be happy for a long long time. Right from my teenage years I can say. I have explored spirituality and had the guts to explore atheism as well, for a while. My point isn’t to prove if there is any supreme creator in this universe or not… whether you are a theist or atheist…no one in this world is wise or knowledgeable to prove anything about this topic.
Nonetheless that isn’t even the point of this blog.
So what’s the point?
I was wondering if the state of happiness is just like any other biochemical condition caused in humans due to any external force or event.
I have no idea what I am saying or what I’m about to say. It makes no grammatical sense either. So don’t blame me for disturbing your peace of mind.
What if I replace the word “external” with the word “internal” does that make any sense?
Can we be solely responsible for everything that happens to us? Isn’t there any external force? Anything like luck?
There’s one mantra I recite the moment I start drowning into my own whirlpool of thoughts,
And the Mantra is,
Everything happens for a reason.
This sentence waters the wildfire of my thoughts!! This means at the very least I do believe in luck. How could one not believe in it…life is so random…so unstructured…uneven.
Extent of randomness
If you are wondering how random life can be, let me give a common example.
There are people with whom you might have lived or are living for years and yet their absence sometimes makes you feel more relieved than their presence.
And then you meet a few people in your life, for a short while but their absence stays with you for a lifetime.